Dream-hustle burnout is real. I experienced it recently, but you can save yourself the hassle by avoiding my mistakes.
[Ville Valkeisenmäki | Flickr | Modified]
But on the inside, a raging battle tormented me. I did everything I could to keep it inside and bottled up. But like a festering wound, the puss oozed forth.
I burnt out like a candle in a tornado.
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I’m going to be 100% authentic in this post. Chasing your dream is damn hard.
The hours of work it takes, the nagging of I’m not there yet ringing in the back of your head, these things layer stress on top of what I presume is already a stressful life.
I’ve spent the past year encouraging people to chase their dream. I wrote a book about it. I try to be optimistic and give hope to people who think achieving their dream is impossible.
But dream-hustling is hard.
After weeks of focusing on nothing but my dream, I burned out.
I couldn’t sleep. I bickered. I sulked. I lost all motivation to Step Forward.
How did I let it happen?
I didn’t focus on my real purpose. I didn’t take the small steps. I didn’t react to my reality.
In other words, I failed to listen to the advice I preached week in and week out!
I don’t want you to burn out like I did. So I put together three essential pieces of advice I ignored and what I did to overcome my burnout and get back on track.
I didn’t focus on my real purpose. I didn’t take small steps. I didn’t react to my reality.
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Find Your Purpose
“Why” is an annoying question. It gets under your skin. It scares you.
But asking “Why” over and over again is the key to unlocking your black box.
The black box, I argue, is your purpose of why you do what you do. I’ll demonstrate.
I want to be a writer.
Why? Because I want to be self-employed
Why? Because I want to be in control of my time.
Why? Because I want to invest more time into my family.
Why? Because I enjoy my family.
Why? Because being a part of this family is what I do best.
I don’t need to be a writer to enjoy my family. So why did I stress so much about reaching my dream when my purpose is right in front of me?
Ego? Pride?
Whatever it was, I set aside time this past weekend and only focused on the two most important people in my life: Erica and Henry. For 48 straight hours, I did nothing else.
I didn’t think about my dream.
I didn’t worry about the work.
I didn’t put myself first.
And my subscriber list continued to grow (by the largest amount in one week).
And people continued to read my posts.
And pre-orders for my book still trickled in.
When you focus on your purpose alongside your dream, good things happen. When you focus on your dream to attain your purpose, you burn out.
Focus on your purpose, not your dream so that you can enjoy your journey along the way.
Slow Down, Take Small Steps
I’m in this for the long run. As a Millennial I have another 50-60 years to go, God willing. If I want to be a full-time writer, I’ll get there. But it’s not going to happen tomorrow.
My dream won’t come true tomorrow.
But I want it to!
The thought of one day I walking away from my nine-to-five, hugging my son, and asking What do you want to do today, buddy? haunts me.
I’m not ready. If I reached my dream tomorrow, I’d fail. I haven’t learned to appreciate my journey. I haven’t laid a solid foundation on which to build.
Nevertheless, over the past few weeks I sulked because I wasn’t there yet. With a bitter taste in my mouth, I watched as others boasted their successes.
Why can’t I be them?
Because I haven’t endured the small steps. I went all in with a seven-two off-suit. I threw a Hail Mary on the first play of the game. I proposed on the second date.
(None of those metaphorical situations worked out.)
Instead, I took some time off, away from my dream, and reflected on the man I want to be.
With renewed vigor, I set off again. This time, focusing on the small steps in front of me, not my destination on the horizon.
React to Reality
Too often we wish for a different situation, a different choice, a different path. But those don’t exist. Leave them. Ignore them.
What if I was a better writer? What if I had more time? What if I didn’t work?
None of those “what if’s” matter. I can only strive to write better. I can only utilize my time more efficiently. And I have to work. It’s that simple.
But what if…
No. I can only react to the reality in front of me, and for the past few weeks, I dwelt on the “what if” instead of the “what is.”
I’ll keep this one simple: don’t dwell on the “what if.” Just don’t. It’s not real. It won’t help you. It’s not healthy.
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Discussion Question: Have you experienced burnout while chasing you dream or trying to improve yourself? If so what did you do to overcome it? Share your answer on Twitter or in the comments.
The post How to Avoid Dream-Hustle Burnout by Declan Wilson appeared first on A Millennial Type.